Spent On Rainy Days – Bright Eyes

Fell in love with a new song. Thought I’d share:

I think I’ll print it in the personals that I’m looking for a match. Someone to light me up. Someone to burn the proof of the things that I’ve done.

-Bright Eyes – Spent On Rainy Days

An open letter to SiriusXM AltNation and Octane

I should be getting my house ready for visitors this weekend, but I’ve been so sick of evasive channel surfing on satellite radio that I have to sit down and write this instead. Plus having enough monitor space to have lists, music players, and my blog open made this a good excuse to use it.

The music on Alt Nation has been pretty weak lately. Someone recommended Octane as an alternative. I posit that channel also suffers from the same condition: bullshit. Let’s take a look at what I mean with some examples. What better place to start than with the top 18 (Alt Nation) and top 15 (Octane)? These are the most requested, most played and are a decent example of everything that’s wrong with America.

Alt Nation:

  1. Passion Pit – Carried Away
    1. First five seconds: What the fuck is this? Am I in 1980 all over again? Shoot me in the fucking face – this song is the top alternative song. This is apparently what people want to hear. Stop. Hit repeat. Listen to the first five seconds again. Feel like punching a baby? I do. No baby around? Punch someone else. Sitting in your house alone blogging? No problem. Punch yourself in the face. Someone deserves a punch in the face.
    2. It continues. Oh jesus. boop boop boop doop I’m so happy and dopey. Hit those fucking tinkly sound things again. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
    3. I feel like this being the number one song I don’t even HAVE to continue anymore. But let’s because we can and I feel angry.
  2. The Black Keys – Little Black Submarine
    1. Ok, this isn’t terrible. Give me more energy though.
    2. Alright – despite a slow start it does get better.
    3. 2 minute mark – OK now we’re fucking talking. Why didn’t you start with that you assholes. Don’t fuck around so long before getting down to business.
  3. The Killers – “Runaways”
    1. Oh – the first five seconds of this bullshit are almost the same as #1. Not promising.
    2. Fuck you. You suck. Don’t play this whiny song ever again.
    3. This is number 3 on what America wants to hear for alternative? See face punching comment.
  4. fun. – “Some Nights”
    1. First five seconds: You’ve reproduced that shitty 80s synthesizer sound with your voice. Whatanamazingaccomplishmentgokillyourself.
    2. Is this The Lion King? Where the fuck am I? How did we get here. Who would voluntarily subject themselves to this?
    3. What do you stand for? Everything that is terrible about music right now.
  5. Grouplove – “Itchin’ On A Photograph”
    1. First five seconds: Clapping.. well.. at least it’s not….
    2. 10 seconds. SHITTY SYNTHESIZER!!!! GOD DAMN IT FUCK FUCK FUCK
    3. This is the same song as all the others as far as I’m concerned. I can’t even come up with new unique comments. Melody is poppy synth happy crap. Vocals are whiny bullshit. Subject matter is completely uncipherable through this sad sad high pitched garbage.
    4. Hmm – ok maybe it’s growing on my after the two minute mark. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!! Next. Song. Stop.
  6. Of Monsters & Men – “Mountain Sound”
    1. First five seconds: You hipster fucks I will hunt down every keyboard and synthesizer on this pitiful, god-forsaken earth and burn them all to the ground and laugh maniacally, crying into the ashes.
    2. Happy hippy horseshit. I do like this girl’s voice though. I bet she’s cute. I hope so, because I don’t see any other redeeming qualities in this song.
  7. Two Door Cinema Club – “Sleep Alone”
    1. This song is all the others. Nothing remarkable here. Terrible for all the same reasons. Worse because it’s just an exact fucking duplicate of the rest.
    2. I almost feel like I can’t go on. I won’t make it.. I need to change the station already to Octane.

OK – we’re switching to Octane. Wait, I’m not completely done ripping on Alt Nation. There is plenty of shit left in the pile. Don’t even get me fucking started on how much of a turd A Silent Film – “Danny, Dakota & The Wishing Well” is. Ok.. well let’s talk a little about it.. diddly diddly diddly synthesizers are back again and this song is the same shit as all the other songs kill me! Just watch a few seconds of that pre-pubescent, Beiber-cut fuck of a lead singer. God damn it go back to finger banging high school cheerleaders. Put down the fucking guitar. I never want to see you near a microphone again. Who is that chick in the video? She seems nice.

Still not done. One of the songs is Ball Park Music – “It’s Nice To Be Alive”. I won’t link to it. I won’t even fucking listen to it. Just read the title. I disagree with the core concepts of your statement. I already know any music that you produce from that point of view is guaranteed to be un-listenable.

Let’s put down the haterade, maybe we can switch to Octane. Pure hard rock. That must be my savior. It sounds like exactly what I want. I’m just a few more synthesized notes from shooting out my car stereo as punishment. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED – THERE IS A LOADED GUN IN THE GLOVE BOX YOU PIECE OF SHIT RADIO. BEHAVE AND RENDER UNTO ME THE ROCK!

Octane:

  1. Halestorm – “I Miss The Misery”
    1. First 5 seconds – This is the first time I’ve ever heard this song. I feel like I’ve heard it at least 1000 times. I’m so addicted to, all the things you do. Oh – right this is Saving Abels – Addicted. Same. Fucking. Song. This is number one.
    2. Every post is a repost of a repost. It’s like /b/ has invaded the world of music.
  2.  In This Moment – “Blood”
    1. OK, you’re angry. This shows promise.
    2. Hmm – the KoRn like list of gripes in a female voice. Heard it. Nothing new.
    3. Oh – you’ve taken the same style as song 1 and mixed in dubstep. Fuck you.
    4. No musical value at all here. Period. Each wub wub drop is yet another smoking hole in my center console. Sorry to do this to you radio, but you’re done.
  3. Nonpoint – Left “For You” 
    1. I have high hopes. Nonpoint released a good song a long time ago that I liked.
    2. Only tolerable. I do not hate this song. I do not love this song. I could play this in the background and it would be forgettable.
  4. Adelitas Way – “Criticize” 
    1. HOLY FUCKING SHIT I LIKE THIS SONG
    2. 13 songs and this is the second one I like 🙁 Eat a dick.
  5. Gone For Days – “Guilty Pleasure”
    1. Starts with a guitar. Promising.
    2.  50 seconds in – you lost me.
    3. Continuing – this is just a sad country song with an electric guitar. Fail. Make it stop.
  6. Otherwise – “Full Circle”
    1. More promising start.
    2. Still like it 35 seconds in.
    3. Just realized the name of this album is True Love Never Dies.
    4. I fucking hate that hard rock is just a bunch of dudes bitching about how lonely, sad, and pathetic they are without their ex girlfriends. Fuck this shit.
    5. I still believe that inside of you is a terrible musician.
  7. Five Finger Death Punch – “Coming Down”
    1. The name of this band is what I want to do to every fucking song I hear recently. Props for this!
    2. You miss your ex too? Go five finger fist fuck yourself to death! (Hat tip to Nick Spor for this particular line. He said it once in college and it’s stuck with me ever since.)
    3. No there is no one listening who wants to hear your final prayers you whiny piece of shit. Your voice may be deeper than the Alt Nation list but the whinging is unmistakably similar.
    4. You will never be what I want you to be: Good at life.
OK. Fuck you satellite radio. I’m going back to the 90s because this decade is fucking shit lately. Back to NPR, POTUS, and Lithium.
Kids – your music these days is terrible. If you listen to any of these songs that I disliked and disagreed with me…. you are also terrible and should let me know so I can unfriend you on Facebook or real life.
Fuck. Someone link me a good song in the comments please.

 

 

CCIE Voice Written Studying + Bayside

I’ve been studying like crazy lately. The CCIE Voice Written has become more difficult since the last time I attempted to pass it for recertification. Every two years I have to pass the multiple choice part to keep the certification active.

I’m at a bit of a disadvantage because I’ve heard a lot of the material is similar to CVOICE. I’ve never done the CVOICE cert, so now I’m reading through the 700+ page book this week. Wish me luck for Friday. I’ve already failed this stupid test twice (by a razor thin margin) and I’m REALLY hoping I won’t have to go through that again. I can’t stand being less than excellent in my field of excellence. This was the one thing I was still good at 😛

ANYWAY – I was studying and this Bayside song came on that I’ve probably posted before.

Do you ever wake up to realize
that your life is meaningless?
Does it give you strength or lead
you to your grave at a young age?

I have an easy answer for this. Every time I’ve woken up and gone “Why the fuck am I doing this again? It doesn’t mean anything.” I’m able to say “Fuck it – do whatever you want. Do what makes you happy. You’re doing it because you want to.”

It’s empowering.

Maybe I’m spoiled because I’m responsible to no one but myself. It doesn’t hurt that the job pays the bills pretty well. At any point I could quit, move across the country (or ride my motorcycle there), and start all over again. I probably won’t, but I could.

Maybe I should search for something to give my life meaning, purpose, some greater goal. For now though, I’m pretty happy with being financially stable, able to take epic vacations, ride or drive anything that’s dangerously powerful, and drink my face off once in a while with friends. Is there more to it than that? I don’t care. Ask me in a few years.

Sometimes I go back and read old blog posts. I’m WAY happier now.

Heard this song on Californication.

I’ve been watching a LOT of Californication. I really enjoy all of the interesting human interaction. Also boobs.

It’s smart, funny, depressing, joyful.. all of the things I like…

Anyway, this song came on and I really liked it

All Work. No Play.

Makes me a dull boy:

Every weekend of mine is planned out until March 16th. I have either Saturday change windows, Friday windows, or on March 11th a full on 14 hour session starting at midnight and going all day Sunday.

Maybe the worst part is I chose this schedule myself to hit optimistic deadlines.

At least I usually only work 6 days a week.

When my March windows are done with I’m going to take some serious time off from work.

The Kills – Tape Song

Normally I don’t post this frequently, but I was rocking out at work listening to Pandora.

It decided to spit out one amazing song after another! I’ve heard this one before and wish there was a bigger Thumbs Up button that I could hit. If this song were a married girl I would hit on it inappropriately.

Time aint gonna cure you honey. Time dont give a shit.

Cartel – Wasted

I really liked Cartel – Wasted. I was even sort of moved when I listened to it. Now you should listen to it.