re: lonely

So I posted last October about being lonely in NC.

Almost a year has passed and I feel pretty much the same way.

I looked back on that post and realized that three good female friends of mine commented on it.

Then I look back even further and I sort of always remember being lonely at times. Maybe it’s part of the human condition. Maybe it’s because I go through big periods of time when I’m feeling anti-social. Tough call.

I do rememeber a period of a few years in college when I always had someone to talk to and was in constant communication with friends and others.

I think that’s what I miss.

I need to spend less time at work stressing out about work, and more time chatting it up with friends and doing random things.

Here’s a typical re-enactment of an outing with friends.
—–
Waitress comes to table.

Me: I’ll have a Killian’s
Brendan: Can I get a Yuengling
Marv: Guinness
Kaufman: What do you have on tap?
Waitress: Answers.
Kaufman: Hmmmm… how about…

Waitress walks away..

Silence ensues..

Lauren: Silently thinks “Man I love New Kids on the Block”

Me: How bout that crazy work thing.

Everyone gets excited and animated about crazy work things for 3 minutes.

Silence

Drinks Arrive

Silence

More drinks

10PM rolls around..

Me: Man I’m tired.. work is killing me.
Kaufman: I’m gonna go home and play WoW
Brendan: I’m going to bed
Kurt: Silently thinks “mmmmm bed with Lauren”

Exit.
—–
I think working form 9:30 – 7 puts a huge drain on the social life. Most days I go home and just pass out and do nothing until it’s time to go back to work.

Where am I going with this you ask?

The point here is I need to adjust my work life balance.. make more time for being around people.

I can hear Heather saying now:

“It’s people time now Jason!”

Probably true… so maybe if I stop spending so much time at work, or home alone, things will start looking up.

I think the secondary point is that more of those girls I mentioned at the beginning of this post need to come to Raleigh, NC for a visit.

The tertiary point is that even with the friends I have now I miss having a sidekick. I think everyone needs a sidekick. This doesnt have to mean dating or anything like that… just someone to talk to who really understands things. Someone to confide in, and someone who confides in you.

I feel like I had one or two at some point.. and now I don’t. I can’t really define it more than that.

I am much too tired to be posting. That will probably all sound ridiculous when I wake up in the morning and read it.