This entry is dedicated to Sparta and all of the awesome images the Internet has collectively come up with since 300 came out.

Enjoy.

Last week I went to Ozzfest. It was so much fun that I still haven’t fully recovered. My ears were ringing for 3 days.

There is a story behind the trip to Ozzfest, but first I’ll give you the pictures that I know you came here for.

This dude passed out on the lawn. Bad idea.

And then there were the girls who decided to take off their shirts and walk around topless all day with nothing more than a bit of body paint. These girls deserve an award. Here’s a pic of one. These were massive, and not all that attractive uncovered. I had to take the picture just because I could. I think you’ll understand.

And now onto the story about Ozzfest. I got pretty drunk the night before, and apparently so did nick and jim. We didn’t get started on the day til like 11:30 or something like that.

We showed up at Ozzfest and it was about a million degrees with harsh sunshine, and no shade to be found in the entire place. We stood outside in the sun from 12:30 – sunset, and then left the concert at around 11. At which point we sat in the parking lot waiting to get out for a LONG ASS time.

Here’s a list of some of the fun things that happened during the day.

Nick is starting a band. Here are his first singles.

1. Fuck your mom til she’s dead.
2. Fist fuck fury.

We got about a million free mint tingle trojan condoms. Which is awesome? It was entertaining either way. The condom girls weren’t leaving us alone. I think at one point nick and i propositioned them to help us test out the new condoms. They said they weren’t allowed to. Bitches.

If anyone likes mint flavored things (and isn’t gay, or male (you know who you are)) let me know if you want to help me test these out. It’s in the name of science. And flavor. Do it for science at least.

We had way too many 3-5 dollar beers. Which completely drained my funds, but got me in the mood to listen to crazy loud music.

Here’s a highlight of bands that rocked.

The first few bands on the second stage weren’t really all that impressive to me, but i was sober then. Rob Zombie was Rob Zombie. He sounds the same in concert as he does on the CD. Impressive feat I suppose. It was cool to see him in concert.

In Flames was pretty damn cool. They rocked out with their cocks out. Way to be Swedish and still cool.

Mudvayne. Enough said. Mudvayne was fucking awesome. I was really impressed with their live show, and want to go get some more of their music now.

Iron Maiden was a band I had never listened to much. They put on an awesome show. It was wicked entertaining: “SCREAM FOR ME BUFFALO”

Black Sabbath was definitely good. I kept turning to Nick and saying “That’s Ozzy Fucking Osbourne right up there in front of us.”

After the show we wasted a bit of time by going to Buffalo. But it worked out because we got to freeze our nuts off in a swimming pool after a long concert. Which was perfect really, because I was definitely covered in sweat. The great thing about the concert is that it wasn’t as dirty as most other concerts I’ve been to. I’m not sure how that happened. Either way, we got to clean off in this pool, and got a girl yelled at by her parents. Who lives with their parents? That’s useless to us. Absolutely useless, and a good way to kill a possibly fun time.

If there’s anything about the show I’ve left out leave a comment.

So I’ve posted some new pictures. Not that recently really, but I figured I should put links to them, with some kind of story.

The story will have to wait, I’ll get to it eventually. Here are the links anyway.

Liquor Room

Grad Project

Some Random Drinking <– I know this one wasn’t actually on the 4th of July, I just don’t remember too much about it, so the 4th is close enough.

Much like the idiot that I am, I started some Internet drama by not thinking things through all the way, and having a sick sense of humor by thinking things are funny before I fully grasp the effects that will have on other people.

I guess I’ll start at the very beginning. A very good place to begin. (as someone once said)

It all started about exactly one year ago. I was staying at RIT for the summer, and working in the labs. Pat and I were bored, and Dave was bored. Dave promised that he could get some cute girls to come over to my apartment. I immediately agreed to this idea. I was in a relationship at the time, but that should NEVER stop anyone from hanging out with cute girls.

These girls come over, are very shy, and don’t say much. I didn’t think much of it at the time, other than being a little disappointed that I didn’t get to talk to Sarah a bit more.

That was last June or July or something.

Months go buy, or something like that. October rolls around and everyone comes back to school. Dave has a party at his house and says something like “oh, those girls from before are going to be there.” So of course I go.

We wound up getting pretty retarded and having a very good time. I realized that Sarah and I could definitely be friends. You could say that we got along pretty well.

Weeks later Dave has another party. I bring my friend Jason, everyone gets wicked wasted and we have a sleep over in the basement. (creepy right?)

Halloween rolls around, things continue to get rough with Jen and I. Thanksgiving rolls around, things with Jen and I end. Valentines day rolls around, Jen and I finally stop sleeping with each other, and talking to each other. (i guess that’s an unnecessary detail, but it took a long time to go from “breakup” to “no more sex”)

I start talking to Sarah online more because I needed someone to talk to about things. You can’t always be talking to your guy friends. Sometimes you want to have a conversation that doesnt involve beer, boobs, or computers. (really)

At some point there was a trip to Caledonia for a late night movie that wasn’t really productive. But I didn’t give up hope, because I’m like that.

I got ridiculously busy with work and things, talk to Sarah on and off, then this summer rolls around. Sarah and I have been promising each other for months that we’ll hang out, or do something, or go somewhere on the motorcycle. So I invite her and her friend Steph over to our apartment. Things go almost exactly like they did a year earlier (only Sarah has a different hair cut (which looks nice)). They show up and are pretty quiet and shy. It’s like we had to start all over again. I guess it doesnt help that sometimes I’m pretty shy too. I shouldn’t have been so shy, because I had about a quarter of a liter of rum (could i get a liter cola?) before they showed up. (whoops, I like rum)

We go to the bar (MacGregors) with my roommates, Ward, and the girls. Forced conversation ensues, we start to have a bit of a good time, and then they have to leave. I didn’t think much of it besides “man, this is like one of those awkward dates I’ve been on when I was 16 and couldnt think of what to say. With 6 people involved.”

At the end of the night Steve and Ward are joking around with the girls. Pretty much giving them a hard time. I’ve been disengaged from the conversation for the entire night. I’m at the head of the table, and haven’t been able to hear anything anyone has said for the past hour. I was off in my world with Rum and Ithica Apricot. So the girls are about to leave, and Ward and Steve drop some pretty serious insults, and I’m left with absolutely nothing to say to salvage the evening.

Disaster ensues.

I’m pretty much worse off than when I started the evening. The point was to maybe get to know Sarah a little bit better in person as opposed to the Internet, but that didn’t really happen. On top of that my friends had, in my eyes, completely turned those girls off from EVER wanting to talk to me again. That wasn’t really what I was going for. I was hoping for the exact opposite.

Steve posts on the Interweb about everything that is wrong with those girls (because we know steve has a history of bitching about women online)

Sarah writes how she had a fun time, even though my friends were rude.

I’m struck by the juxtaposition of the two posts. I wonder if they were both at the same bar. Steve’s interpretation of the night is completely different than what Sarah walked away with. I find this funny, and put it in my away message.

Sarah reads what Steve had to say about the night. More disaster ensues. In my short-sighted thinking, I had forgotten the level of offensiveness Steve reached in his post. It was at about a 7/10 on the “Jim Caggy” scale of offensiveness. That puts it at an 11/10 on the “real world” scale of offensiveness. He said some rediculously mean things, that would have been funny if just aimed at women in general, but were personal attacks on girls I was trying to get to know better.

Enter guilt by association.

Since I’m the douchebag who made it possible for the girls to read Steve’s post, I imply that I agree with what Steve has to say. I do think what he had to say was funny, but don’t think that it was true. That’s why I said reality was a very slippery thing. Everyone has their own version of it. My version of reality doesn’t match Steve’s. Steve’s doesn’t match Sarah’s.

Now, thanks to me being an idiot, I might have lost someone who could have been a good friend.

She was pretty pissed about the whole thing. I understand that completely. I’m not exactly sure what I was thinking earlier by putting his post in my away message.

Sarah had a response for me, and for Steve. This is where the Internet drama really gets going. (on a side note, Sarah you rock for the title of that entry. I laughed for a good 3 minutes) It’s sort of a self-perpetuating circle of hate. I’d really like it to stop. Sarah could be a really cool friend to hang out with if I got to know her better.

Hopefully by putting all of this here I can stop this before it gets really going. I didn’t want anyone to get hurt. I didn’t want to lose any friends. I just wanted to get to know someone better, and it all went horribly wrong.

Sorry.

I posted links to all of this because hopefully you guys can look back on it and think it’s a little bit funny. Please lighten up and don’t take it too seriously. I don’t mean any harm to anyone. That’s not how I do things. If you got to know me better you’d see that.

(Unless you’re my ex-gf, then you’ll probably think I posted this specifically to piss you off. maybe i did. (Just kidding. I honestly don’t do that. Even though you think I do. I’m just stupid and inconsiderate. I always manage to hurt the people I care about.) HI JEN. HOW’S LIFE? Why do you keep reading these? You know that I know you are )

This weekend went pretty well besides all of the work.

Thursday was a standard MacGregors night except Kaufman brought Heather. It was cool to actuallly get to meet the girl. I was starting to think she didn’t actually exist

Friday night was considerably more fun. Supposedly there was a Toga party at the deuce. We all know how Toga parties and I get along. Very Well.

I had left my favorite Toga at home, so decided to just go in Burns Casual.

There weren’t enough people to really finish a half keg. So according to Sode: “when you have not a lot of people, and a whole lot of beer, the obvious thing to do is drink it all as fast as possible.”

So the weekend turned into KegStandPalooza05. Deuceman will be a shining example of how Friday went:

This weekend was a good weekend for grilling, and we did plenty of that. Along with what Sharon would call “bbq-ing”

Other than that, I’ve got a ton of work to do before this quarter ends. This SafeNet project is pretty big, and I need to put together a proposal for a grad project. Along with finding a job and buying a motrocycle, I’ve got a pretty full schedule ahead of me for the rest of the quarter and the summer.

Graduation is in just 11 days. If anyone thinks they want to come to my graduation let me know. Everyone is invited, no exceptions – even if we haven’t talked in a while.

I enjoy the company of women more than I thought I did. I posted a while back about how being friends with them seemed useless. I guess I just forgot what it’s like to have a close female friend to hang out with.

Anyway, lets do a quick photo recap of the weekend.

On Friday I went to a party at Nick Spor’s place. This was generally a pretty good time. I took a bunch of pictures, we played some asshole, then we switched to some flip cup, and then drama ensued. It was all pretty crazy, and made for an interesting and late night.

On Saturday we went downtown to Monroe Ave. We hit up O’Callaghan’s where they had awesome Yuengling specials.

Then we went to Acme where we just sat around and drank.

After a bit of drinking it was time for some Sal’s pizza. I decided to get a whole pizza with Steve, so we had to sit around for a while and watch drunk people walk in and out. It was cool because I got to see Ward abuse his girl, and I got to see some of the roller hockey guys I know through Will.

Tonight I took Jeni around the labs for a quick tour, had some dinner and conversation, and watched a movie and relaxed. All in all a very good way to start the week. Too bad she’s moving farther away, but maybe we’ll get to hang out more.

so it’s 5am and i have a story.. sonya was the first girl to tell me this.. and it was in the parking lot of dunkin donuts… she told me i was her favorite..

it hit me hard at the time. i was taken aback. i was on cloud nine for weeks.

and i’m sure i’ve used this line on all the girls i’ve met since her.. and even a stripper at klassy cat.. because they all were my favorites at the time….

but tonight melinda gets a special spot.. especially for the goodnight kiss on the cheek.. for reassuring my faith in girls.. melinda is my favorite

The night was a pretty fun time. We went to Daisy Duke’s and watched the girls ride the bull. That was pretty hot. Too bad I left my camera on the bus. You should have seen it.

Here’s a link to the pictures i do have of the limo bus night.

After Daisy Dukes we went somewhere else. And then somewhere else. I think we stopped at barfly, because I remember dancing. ::Shrug::

This weekend we had the golf pros and tennis hos party. It was a damn good time. It was fun to see everyone dressed up again. I must say that Brandon and Gavin go all out for the theme parties. Everyone enjoys it.

Here is a prime example.

So I’ve got a picture of me in my new jacket at the party for those of you who were interested. It’s pretty pimp.

The party was a good time, I took off early to go to the blue house, but Mark wasn’t there when I showed up. So I went home, and missed out on the rest of the party. Apprently Spor and Sode had fun til 4:30.. I guess i should have stuck around.. oh well, there is always next weekend.

And on to the email part. I’ve switched my naming system all around, so now all my machines are in the bbbburns.com domain.

I set up an MX record (like you care) so now you can email me: burns [at] bbbburns {dot} com as well as burns@burns.no-ip.com.. it all gets the mail to the same place..

I went with a family guy naming convention.

Main Box: Quagmire
Mac DNS server: Stewie
Fat ass server: Peter
VMWare box: Lois

I’m picking up some Ludacris tickets today, so that should be fun. Eventually I’ll just run out of money, but until then I plan on having a great time. I’m riding it out on loan money and my small stipend, as well as a tax refund. I really should be ok for the entire summer without having a job at all, because even though I spend money on stupid things, I’ve managed to save up quite a bit. That and my credit card limits could probably get me through an entire year of living without having to spend actual money. But that’s only worst case scenario.

Let’s all hope that I get a nice job somewhere before that happens.

So break is over with and classes are here again. I might as well give you a little rundown of how my break went.

I spent the first few days hanging out here in Rochester catching up on some MPLS reading, and then dropping a whole wad of cash on fixing up some random things with my car. I could use the money back, but it drives like a dream now (for the most part).

So I decided to head home after a few days here. My sister was in town so we got to hang out. That was pretty cool.

Dad was all about making his Vension sticks and jerky. He went all out.

My german shepherd died a while back, so my dad got my step-mom a puppy for christmas. His name is Harley, and it reminds me of a family guy episode I saw last night.

Tom Tucker: “Why are kittens so cute? We’ve disected 18 of them to find their hidden secret. Film at 11″

Harley is ridiculously cute, and such a friendly dog. He cuddles up with just about anyone or anything.

My sister had her 21st birthday. That was supposed to be a fun time, but she’s a huge party-pooper. Which is ok, I understand that it wasn’t the best time for her or I. But my grandma still came up to watch Jen blow out her candles.

I think I also have one of the only pictures of my dad and I next to each other. Usually we’re never in the same picture. Especially now that we don’t see each other so much.

I worked some at delocon and we put together a pretty cool looking network cabinet. I have some pictures on my phone that I’ll post up in here once I email them to myself.

That’s right.. we mounted an LCD monitor to the back of that door to save space. How sweet is that?

It looks like my holidays have gone back to sucking. Maybe in the future I can find someplace to call home again.

Time to get back to classes and school work.

So I decided to take some time off from rochester NY and head to florida for thanskgiving. For some reason i decided it would be a good idea to drive down. It saved me some money, but it was honestly the longest drive ever. If you’ve ever been in a car for 18 hours straight, only stopping for gas, you’d understand what i meant.

anyway. it was a pretty good trip. my brother has grown up so much. i’m glad i got to spend some time hanging out with him.

I got down to florida on a friday night after leaving rochester early friday morning.. (about 3:30 am). We went to one of Cody’s baseball games the next morning. It was a little bit of a trip, and we got to stay in a hotel.

His game was at the Cleveland Indian’s stadium down there. I know what you’re thinking, why would the cleveland indians have a stadium in florida? and to answer this i say.. why not?

supposedly it’s where they filmed “Major League”

Cody managed to steal some bases during the game. That was pretty cool.

Then we all decided to go to a hooters for dinner after the game. did you know they have a hooters inn? i have pictures. i can’t even begin to imagine the amazing things that must go on inside there.

It was different being in a hooters with an entire little league baseball team.

After the hooters the boys were a little crazy, i mean honestly.. do you remember beign 13? you had all this energy and nothing to do.. so i had a few beers and was attacked with pillows..

The next day Cody’s team 10-run-ruled their opposition, so that game was over quick..

The rest of the break I was just hanging out around Mom’s place with Cody, and jen would stop by occassionaly. I monkeyed with their computer systems, and hooked up their stereo equipment for them. IT Superhero at work.

For thanksgiving grandma and grandpa came out to mom’s house. It was a great day. there was all kinds of sunshine. It was amazing to have sunshine and palm trees for thanksgiving.

Here’s grandpa enjoying the sun.

The rest of the break was spent randomly hanging out with jen and cody, and going to the mall a little bit. mostly there was just a whole lot of relaxing.

i did manage to go ice skating outside in florida. that was a pretty cool event. probably another one of my stories that you guys just wont believe, and i dont have any pictures either. but believe me, it was pretty cool. they had a rink inside of a big tent, and at night they raised the sides of the tent and you could just skate around. i hung out with jen in downtown gainesville after skating, and we watched euro-trip at her apartment type place.

she lives with 20 some other girls in a dorm / suite type place. they have a gigantic kitchen, and more rules than i know what to do with. it wasn’t a very fun place to be, everyone was gone because of the holidays, so there wasn’t nearly as much fun to be had.

on the ride back home i was making pretty good time. I decided that i needed to make a stop at the new river bridge and enjoy the scenery and stretch my legs. i’m glad i did. It didn’t add too much extra time to my trip, and i got to look at a really sweet bridge.

I stopped by Jen’s house too.. that was….. interesting to say the least.. i made up a fun little page to tell you what i think of that

Long story short.. now i’m back in Rochester and looking for things to do on the weekends.

I’ve been through the first week of classes, and i’m just getting around to writing about all of this vacation stuff. as usual i just can’t seem to find the time to get things done. maybe it’s a motivation problem, maybe i just have a lot of things going on.

More updates when I get more fun pictures of parties to post.